Hi, well, if you have doubts of this kind, then, personally, it’s hard for me to understand you. But I think that you should take this psychological test https://psycho-tests.com/test/sexual-orientation-test, I myself, of course, did not pass it, but I know that it is used in such cases. I understand that I may not be an expert in such matters and cannot advise much, but this test is not a bad way to look at your problem from a different angle.